Truth: This Woman Needs to Stop Whingeing and Fuck Off

Earlier today, lifestyle "journalist" Rachel Corbett wrote an "article" for news.com.au targeted at highschool kids who are stressed about their HSC exams.
Because for some reason, that's her business.

 Why someone with no kids is writing articles about parenting is beyond me. Tune in next week when I write an article describing what it's like to give birth!

Why someone with no kids is writing articles about parenting is beyond me.
Tune in next week when I write an article describing what it's like to give birth!

As part of her research, Rachel joined a Facebook group called "HSC Discussion Group 2016". Because there's nothing weird about a 35 year old woman joining a group for teenagers.

Corbett's article starts off with her literally acknowledging that she is "completely out of touch with the next generation". Because as we all know, the best way to start an opinion piece is by saying you have no idea what the fuck you're talking about.

Rachel then goes on to cherry pick posts and memes from the group with over 60,000 members. And uses them to prove her point that kids today are scared of hard work and need to grow up.

 "Damn those kids and their pesky memes!" Yelled the out of touch old woman to herself.

"Damn those kids and their pesky memes!" Yelled the out of touch old woman to herself.

Because Rachel is such an expert in hard work and acting like an adult, I thought I would look into her illustrious career to see if I could learn anything from someone who writes articles complaining about internet memes.

(Spoiler: I don't)

 

RACHEL CORBETT'S
LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENTS:

  1. Evicted from the Big Brother House in 2001
  2. That's it.

Well fuck...

 

Let's continue with her article shall we?

Rachel comes up with a Buzzfeed style list of the types of members you will find in the HSC Discussion Group 2016. For some reason she forgets to mention 35 year old women trying blend in with kids half their age but I'll let it slide.

 Clearly Rachel doesn't like YTB on Facebook and therefore, regularly dogs the boys.

Clearly Rachel doesn't like YTB on Facebook and therefore, regularly dogs the boys.

Then she ends her article by mocking children for stressing about the exam they have spent 13 years preparing for.

 Said Rachel, just after writing an article whingeing about shit that literally has nothing to do with her.

Said Rachel, just after writing an article whingeing about shit that literally has nothing to do with her.

Perhaps the reason why Highschool kids are stressed about their HSC exams is because everyone from their teachers, principals, parents and peers have told them it's the most important test they will ever do in their life?

Or maybe they're incredibly focused on academic success so they don't grow up to be a failed Big Brother contestant who writes opinion pieces about school kids for News.com.au because Buzzfeed isn't hiring.

Your guess is as good as mine Rachel.

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- Lew

P.S. Add me on Snapchat.

Username = NebzChat